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nearsighted​,​inconsiderate​,​disastrous.

by nocapitalsnospaces

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khonsu00
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khonsu00 coming back to look at this, I wish mathcore like this wouldn't get lost, it's some of my favorite music ever. Favorite track: denialspelledwrong.
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1.
I am of nowhere I am no longer A spore of indifference I came from nothing I have no lineage I hate everyone Blame for actions requited Scared to be in the wrong Years of conditioning fail I have no home anymore Overdramatic sensory deprivation I should be able to talk to you outside of my songs Slitting nostalgias throat with my fucking decisions Im so exhausted but you never tought me how to stop. Fighting every day over shit you said you still care about memories of thinking you really loved us I never thought family could feel so foreign I never thought i'd lose what you claimed was so important And its all your fault.
2.
Prospects of my paranoia heralded by my precursor. Shredded stems of selflessness leaving everything up to what he determined hereditary. Like none of it ever mattered to me. Lifeless celibate Stealing from your doorstep Selfless imagery You return it for less than What you paid for Like im hopeless in living Or dying What am i scared of? A Careless conjugate Miscarried informant Of my enemy Carry your worrisome Condescendant And function your machineware Elsewhere I dont want to feel like im better off dead Where debt is erased and the money we need comes in I dont want to be another willy loman Dont want the death of a shit salesman.
3.
Nothing to be gained when stealing from those who suffer as you do. Your lack of morality seals this macabre fate.
4.
I forgot you even knew We almost died together Oh youre lost Oh youre last i wish that i was useful oh im last oh im lost Crossing state lines to save their lives You will never see how great youve always been And I am so scared that ill never be able to love the way i always thought i did when I was a kid. Crossing state lines, just to fucking waste time. I will never do anything of worth. Will i ever be able to love the way you were able to without thinking twice? Maybe im just not so nice...
5.
There is no place for what needs to be said There is nothing real here at all. I have no time for you or any of the shit i do. Im forcing everything, I start fights they want to finish. We are voiceless in our homes. Foxtails in my throat choke me to death. I will never be who i wish that i was. I want to be the mother i thought i had. But I am birthless in my bones Ive got no hope. I am not beautiful You are capable of failure. We cannot deny ourselves forever. Abuse your power While my paranoia fuels me The open veins we conceal have infected our architecture. Theres nothing we can do. We cant hide anymore.

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released November 22, 2018

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nocapitalsnospaces Reno, Nevada

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